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Ukrainian
anecdote
How
to distinguish he-hare from doe she-hare?
It is very simple. You catch a hare, and immediately release it. If it ran away
like male - means, he-hare. If it ran away like female - means, she-hare.
Something
more similarly occurs now in the Pentagon. There they are going to determine
sexual belonging. Only not hares, but mice, but volatile components. After
despairing to catch or to render harmless Osama Ben Laden by forces of the
lauded «Delta force», «Marine sealskin», «Green berets» and even marines
of 15th and 26th expeditionary corps’, Americans now
decided to destroy him with the aid of flying mice.
Idea
is simply quite brilliant. Well, you catch there several thousand of these
creatures, you determine professional fitness, you implant miniature
bomb on the breast of each of them and from the aircraft B-52 descend by
parachute in the region of caves, where supposedly hides «terrorist №1».
Already nearer to ground, containers are revealed and let out modern-day suicide
at their will. These
kamikaze will fly and enter into caves and then all those happening to be inside
the cave will be «destroyed».
This
is not a joke, but serious American reality. M. Sturua, living in USA, informed
about this as referred on pages of newspaper «Izvestia». The idea of certain
Laytl Adams, dentist-surgeon from the Irwin city (state of Pennsylvania) on the
use of flying mice for military purposes, occurs, it was tested as early as
1942. Then on the order of White House, implementation of this project was
entrusted to army service of conducting chemical warfare (Army Chemical Warfare
Service). To help dentist was given command of naturalists. Immediately were
caught thousands of flying mice guano in the caves of Karlbad (state of
New-Mexico City) and placed them in Deepfreeze, in order to imitate hibernation.
Special laboratory prepared igniting 9-gram bombs, which in a surgical manner
were implanted in chest of flying mice.
Then
these armed creatures, after placing on 180 pieces in the cardboard boxes, it
was proposed to throw away to Japanese cities. They had to gather under roofs of
houses. Rest was the matter of technology. Small bombs were of delayed action
and houses of Japanese in the agreed-on time had to burn as matches.
But
Americans then could not carry out burning. Many flying mice so did not awake
from artificially created hibernation. Those, who survived, being truly devoted
to America, refused shelter under roofs of enemy houses and were killed in air,
while returning on the way back home through Pacific Ocean. But effect was
nevertheless: during one testing burnt down aircraft hangar, and even car of the
General, who led this project himself. But the Pentagon did not surrender. In
1943, project was handed over to army as inheritance to fleet, and then, after
lapse of time, was gradually devoted to oblivion.
Today
about resuscitation of this idea expressed themselves specialist in the flying
mice, well-known professor-biochemist of USA, John Altringhem. He asserts that
idea can be crowned by success. But individuals, who dwell precisely in caves,
must be used for this. They stretched out there, says professor in the mouse
matters. - But, from other side, these must be a precisely Afghan flying mice,
so to say «mouse of Northern Alliance», warns scientist, since American flying
mice, after falling into unknown medium, can prove to be disoriented, and their
behavior will become unpredicted.
Thus,
Americans now instead of Ben Laden's catching will be busy in Afghanistan, first
of all by the catching of mice. They will first catch them, then they will
transport these to USA, will pack in the hibernation, will be loaded with bombs,
will be brought back to native land and will be let go at liberty. You see, all
of them will fly randomly to Osama Ben Laden.
But
the Pentagon forgets two things. The first: American society on the protection
of animals - organization completely serious and can raise huge noise on
international scale. Mice indeed are not Afghan children. The life of mice is
found under protection of American and international laws. And the second:
patriotism of Afghan flying mice is developed not more badly than in their
American fellows. But suddenly they will fly in no way there? Well, for example,
to Dostum or to air base of USA in Uzbek Khanabad?
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